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	Comments on: Fatherless	</title>
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		<title>
		By: Philip Yancey		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-9/#comment-14984</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Philip Yancey]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 Apr 2018 00:40:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-14984</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-9/#comment-14930&quot;&gt;Trace&lt;/a&gt;.

You&#039;re a writer&#039;s dream: actual proof that I&#039;m connecting with someone out there at a deep, transparent level.  Thank you for &quot;listening,&quot; and encouraging me to keep going.  --Philip]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-9/#comment-14930">Trace</a>.</p>
<p>You&#8217;re a writer&#8217;s dream: actual proof that I&#8217;m connecting with someone out there at a deep, transparent level.  Thank you for &#8220;listening,&#8221; and encouraging me to keep going.  &#8211;Philip</p>
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		<title>
		By: Trace		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-9/#comment-14930</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Trace]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Apr 2018 13:51:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-14930</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[I found this post to be very close to my heart; I can very much relate. The problem was that my dad lived in my house with me and I still felt like I had no dad. The way you speak of looking around in your church for &quot;suitable&quot; fathers, but they shied away from me because it appeared I had a father. Sometimes, strange as it sounds, I wish I had had no father at all, then his lack of interest and ironically his clear anger at me would not have hurt me so much. You are very lucky to have found someone willing and able to help you along your path. 
I am just figuring out that I am not alone in these feelings. There is even a name for it all called &quot;fatherless syndrome&quot; and when it is not addressed can really mess a person up. I made some super poor choices in life because my dad was not up to the task of raising a sensitive girl. This all makes relating to a heavenly father even more tricky because in my book dads are scary people who are kind of unpredictable. Even though my dad is now dead too, he died when I was 25, I still long for a dad who I knew loved me.
 Last, I just found your book Reaching For Invisible God-- or something like that, I bet you know the exact title.   Anyway, even though I have gone to church my whole entire life, I have never heard anyone talk like you talk about God before-- it actually made me feel kinda normal. I am a very careful person who is quite introverted and I think a lot-- okay maybe I even over think, even about God.
Anyway...I am on chapter 5 and I finally feel not quite so ashamed, or guilty maybe about my doubts and questioning of God and the rest. It is like everything I read and hear right now is exactly what I need to hear and read-- including this particular blog post. From what I gather, that is probably God having the Holy Spirit talk to me or guide me. It seems that I get it a little and then I don&#039;t.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I found this post to be very close to my heart; I can very much relate. The problem was that my dad lived in my house with me and I still felt like I had no dad. The way you speak of looking around in your church for &#8220;suitable&#8221; fathers, but they shied away from me because it appeared I had a father. Sometimes, strange as it sounds, I wish I had had no father at all, then his lack of interest and ironically his clear anger at me would not have hurt me so much. You are very lucky to have found someone willing and able to help you along your path.<br />
I am just figuring out that I am not alone in these feelings. There is even a name for it all called &#8220;fatherless syndrome&#8221; and when it is not addressed can really mess a person up. I made some super poor choices in life because my dad was not up to the task of raising a sensitive girl. This all makes relating to a heavenly father even more tricky because in my book dads are scary people who are kind of unpredictable. Even though my dad is now dead too, he died when I was 25, I still long for a dad who I knew loved me.<br />
 Last, I just found your book Reaching For Invisible God&#8211; or something like that, I bet you know the exact title.   Anyway, even though I have gone to church my whole entire life, I have never heard anyone talk like you talk about God before&#8211; it actually made me feel kinda normal. I am a very careful person who is quite introverted and I think a lot&#8211; okay maybe I even over think, even about God.<br />
Anyway&#8230;I am on chapter 5 and I finally feel not quite so ashamed, or guilty maybe about my doubts and questioning of God and the rest. It is like everything I read and hear right now is exactly what I need to hear and read&#8211; including this particular blog post. From what I gather, that is probably God having the Holy Spirit talk to me or guide me. It seems that I get it a little and then I don&#8217;t.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Philip Yancey		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-9/#comment-13117</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Philip Yancey]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 18 Nov 2017 02:21:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-13117</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-12936&quot;&gt;Larry Griffiths&lt;/a&gt;.

I&#039;m delighted to hear from you, Larry.  I was too young to have many memories of Blair Village, but I remember the Griffiths family, and my mother has often commented on you all.  (She&#039;s now 93, and living in north Georgia.)  I&#039;ll send her your comment.  And of course you&#039;re welcome to use the quote.  Your words are very kind and thoughtful.  Thank you.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-12936">Larry Griffiths</a>.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m delighted to hear from you, Larry.  I was too young to have many memories of Blair Village, but I remember the Griffiths family, and my mother has often commented on you all.  (She&#8217;s now 93, and living in north Georgia.)  I&#8217;ll send her your comment.  And of course you&#8217;re welcome to use the quote.  Your words are very kind and thoughtful.  Thank you.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Georgia Wessling		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-12988</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Georgia Wessling]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 09 Nov 2017 17:27:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-12988</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Mine is a mother story.  I had Momma #1 for 10 1/2 years and Momma #2 for 56 years.  I have a few good memories of Momma #1, but scads of memories from Momma #2.  We had a yours, mine and ours family and were blessed.  We were family.  It made life so much easier.  God is so good to give us those who can love us as we are.

The best memory of Momma #2 is that she told me, in my late teens, that she believed every word I ever said to her.  Because, she knew, that if it was a lie, I would be back within 3 days to tell her the truth.  God would make me feel so guilty and I would just have to repent and go tell Momma.

My youngest brother made a statement about our mother that I wish could have been put on her tombstone.  The preacher did not know Mom, so he asked us what he could say about her.  My brother said, &quot;The best thing you can say about Mom is that she took 3 families and made them 1.&quot;  I do hope Mom heard that.  And still today I get people who were raised in our church and in the Children&#039;s Church talk about Mom.  She was in charge of their behavior and did a memorable job.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Mine is a mother story.  I had Momma #1 for 10 1/2 years and Momma #2 for 56 years.  I have a few good memories of Momma #1, but scads of memories from Momma #2.  We had a yours, mine and ours family and were blessed.  We were family.  It made life so much easier.  God is so good to give us those who can love us as we are.</p>
<p>The best memory of Momma #2 is that she told me, in my late teens, that she believed every word I ever said to her.  Because, she knew, that if it was a lie, I would be back within 3 days to tell her the truth.  God would make me feel so guilty and I would just have to repent and go tell Momma.</p>
<p>My youngest brother made a statement about our mother that I wish could have been put on her tombstone.  The preacher did not know Mom, so he asked us what he could say about her.  My brother said, &#8220;The best thing you can say about Mom is that she took 3 families and made them 1.&#8221;  I do hope Mom heard that.  And still today I get people who were raised in our church and in the Children&#8217;s Church talk about Mom.  She was in charge of their behavior and did a memorable job.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Larry Griffiths		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-12936</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Larry Griffiths]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 04 Nov 2017 04:48:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-12936</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Hello Philip,
     Since those years of 1949-1953, that my family lived directly across the court from your family, I’ve often thought of you, your mother and your brother.  During that time I was in my seventh through eleventh years of live.  
     While reading your reflection of your childhood, I saw a side of your life that I had never thought of before, “being fatherless.”  Those years of your dad’s illness, passing and struggles that your family experienced, came to my remembrance as if it were yesteryear.  Your brother and I were closer in age and were playmates.  
     Over the years, our mothers kept in contact with each other.  Although, Mother would tell me when she had heard from Mildred, I really didn’t get any details about you or Marshall.  I went off to college in 1960, and joined the US Air Force in 1964, and then the US Army for the next twenty-seven years, so I completely lost contact with your family.
     Your family has always had a special place in my heart.  I learned from my brother, Terry, that you were a writer and was excited to hear of your success.  I know that you had a real understanding of God’s relationship to man, especially during life’s trials of pain and suffering.  It pleases me to know that you have been giving comfort and aid to those who have experienced or are passing through that time in their lives. 
     There have been times that I have come across the name, Philip Yancey, through LinkedIn and Facebook.  My attempts to contact you all proved to be fruitless.  Today while searching for quotes about service of famous people, I came one of your quotes, “Fulfillment comes not in pursuit of happiness, but rather in pursuit of service.”  I would like to use your quote in a calendar I’m making for the residents of Moapa Valley, NV.  May I use it?
     Now that I have found you, I will be following you on Facebook and your website.
My best regards and wishes to you and yours.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hello Philip,<br />
     Since those years of 1949-1953, that my family lived directly across the court from your family, I’ve often thought of you, your mother and your brother.  During that time I was in my seventh through eleventh years of live.<br />
     While reading your reflection of your childhood, I saw a side of your life that I had never thought of before, “being fatherless.”  Those years of your dad’s illness, passing and struggles that your family experienced, came to my remembrance as if it were yesteryear.  Your brother and I were closer in age and were playmates.<br />
     Over the years, our mothers kept in contact with each other.  Although, Mother would tell me when she had heard from Mildred, I really didn’t get any details about you or Marshall.  I went off to college in 1960, and joined the US Air Force in 1964, and then the US Army for the next twenty-seven years, so I completely lost contact with your family.<br />
     Your family has always had a special place in my heart.  I learned from my brother, Terry, that you were a writer and was excited to hear of your success.  I know that you had a real understanding of God’s relationship to man, especially during life’s trials of pain and suffering.  It pleases me to know that you have been giving comfort and aid to those who have experienced or are passing through that time in their lives.<br />
     There have been times that I have come across the name, Philip Yancey, through LinkedIn and Facebook.  My attempts to contact you all proved to be fruitless.  Today while searching for quotes about service of famous people, I came one of your quotes, “Fulfillment comes not in pursuit of happiness, but rather in pursuit of service.”  I would like to use your quote in a calendar I’m making for the residents of Moapa Valley, NV.  May I use it?<br />
     Now that I have found you, I will be following you on Facebook and your website.<br />
My best regards and wishes to you and yours.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Susan Dikschei		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-12308</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Susan Dikschei]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 01 Oct 2017 05:54:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-12308</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Dear Philip, thank you for sharing your gift of wisdom with so many through the gifts we have in modern media and communication.  I have just finished reading Vanishing Grace and all that you wrote resonated so strongly with me.  I have spoken of this book so much with my family, that there is a queue to borrow it from me.
I wanted to share a little of me, and thank you for giving me the courage to write a blog, for my children, especially the ones that lost their father.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Dear Philip, thank you for sharing your gift of wisdom with so many through the gifts we have in modern media and communication.  I have just finished reading Vanishing Grace and all that you wrote resonated so strongly with me.  I have spoken of this book so much with my family, that there is a queue to borrow it from me.<br />
I wanted to share a little of me, and thank you for giving me the courage to write a blog, for my children, especially the ones that lost their father.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Deb		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11395</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Deb]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 11 Aug 2017 21:01:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-11395</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11393&quot;&gt;Philip Yancey&lt;/a&gt;.

Yes, a &quot;note&quot; can revive our souls for a week, but your books on grace have sustained me for years.  The culture has moved away from those teachings at a frightening level.  Almost to the level that the concept that we can demonstrate radical grace on a human level might seem to have been a mirage, but I think of examples from your books, and they have kept me during the confusing times.

Also, when I was struggling with my brain, I often thought of the woman typing with one finger or the prisoners who were still able to sing in a crowded cell.

There are very few authors, who have fed me as many stories for a cold Winter&#039;s night season.

Your talking about reading, and these stories of father figures and those stories seem like vitamin supplements to my soul.

Yes, the Bible is the real food version, but there have been times, when I found myself needing to hear the heart-warming stories to understand that it is possible to keep my heart from waxing cold.

I genuinely consider grace to be the supplement we all probably need like a B Vitamin.  Love, gets to be Vitamin A.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11393">Philip Yancey</a>.</p>
<p>Yes, a &#8220;note&#8221; can revive our souls for a week, but your books on grace have sustained me for years.  The culture has moved away from those teachings at a frightening level.  Almost to the level that the concept that we can demonstrate radical grace on a human level might seem to have been a mirage, but I think of examples from your books, and they have kept me during the confusing times.</p>
<p>Also, when I was struggling with my brain, I often thought of the woman typing with one finger or the prisoners who were still able to sing in a crowded cell.</p>
<p>There are very few authors, who have fed me as many stories for a cold Winter&#8217;s night season.</p>
<p>Your talking about reading, and these stories of father figures and those stories seem like vitamin supplements to my soul.</p>
<p>Yes, the Bible is the real food version, but there have been times, when I found myself needing to hear the heart-warming stories to understand that it is possible to keep my heart from waxing cold.</p>
<p>I genuinely consider grace to be the supplement we all probably need like a B Vitamin.  Love, gets to be Vitamin A.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Philip Yancey		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11393</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Philip Yancey]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 11 Aug 2017 13:57:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-11393</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11391&quot;&gt;Deb&lt;/a&gt;.

What a journey you have been on!  And now this &quot;grace note&quot; to me--it will keep me going for at least a week.  I am humbled and blessed.  --Philip]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11391">Deb</a>.</p>
<p>What a journey you have been on!  And now this &#8220;grace note&#8221; to me&#8211;it will keep me going for at least a week.  I am humbled and blessed.  &#8211;Philip</p>
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		<title>
		By: Deb		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11391</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Deb]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 11 Aug 2017 04:38:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-11391</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[I was just reading your thoughts in your question and answer section and found so many things to think about.  You were one of the thinkers I turned to at the beginning of my Christian walk.  I came to Christ as a middle aged adult from a vocally atheist family.

When you come to Christ as an adult, there are no mentors or people to disciple you.  It is books and the radio and when I am blessed to have time at home, television.  Nowadays, the internet.

You are a father in my faith.  

Billy Graham was another one, because he was the one voice who kept saying that I could come just as I am and your voice talked about grace and about a real form of Christianity, which I didn&#039;t know really existed anywhere anymore, but I read about it in stories of great Christians.

I came here today, because I needed your voice.

Thank you that you are so eloquent and so devoted to the cause of grace.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I was just reading your thoughts in your question and answer section and found so many things to think about.  You were one of the thinkers I turned to at the beginning of my Christian walk.  I came to Christ as a middle aged adult from a vocally atheist family.</p>
<p>When you come to Christ as an adult, there are no mentors or people to disciple you.  It is books and the radio and when I am blessed to have time at home, television.  Nowadays, the internet.</p>
<p>You are a father in my faith.  </p>
<p>Billy Graham was another one, because he was the one voice who kept saying that I could come just as I am and your voice talked about grace and about a real form of Christianity, which I didn&#8217;t know really existed anywhere anymore, but I read about it in stories of great Christians.</p>
<p>I came here today, because I needed your voice.</p>
<p>Thank you that you are so eloquent and so devoted to the cause of grace.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Philip Yancey		</title>
		<link>https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-8/#comment-11044</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Philip Yancey]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 20 Jul 2017 16:41:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://philipyancey.com/?p=6067#comment-11044</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-7/#comment-10958&quot;&gt;Dana Engstrom&lt;/a&gt;.

That&#039;s the Jay I know--always steady and wise.  (Although he went through a frenetic, zealous phase too, and only mellowed over time.) In his place, I would have stepped on your husband&#039;s foot!   --Philip]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://philipyancey.com/fatherless/comment-page-7/#comment-10958">Dana Engstrom</a>.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s the Jay I know&#8211;always steady and wise.  (Although he went through a frenetic, zealous phase too, and only mellowed over time.) In his place, I would have stepped on your husband&#8217;s foot!   &#8211;Philip</p>
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